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My Mohamed is different (part 1. negative examples)

Updated: Oct 3, 2021

If fate takes you into the Arab world and you meet someone you would like to spend the rest of your life with, this article is for you too. Did you choose a partner from abroad? You should be aware that that decision is not only for him, but his culture, customs, simply the world, which he grew up in. The clash of different cultures and different mentality, is the cause of frequent misunderstandings in mixed relationships. For a European woman, there might be situations, which she finds diametrically different from what she knows and is used to. In this blog, I will only write about the negative examples that I encounter most often. However, they do not have to discourage you from having a relationship with an Arab man. I know many women who are happily married to an Arab and I am one of them. Before you decide on a partner from an Arab country, you should find out a few things about him.


It's nice that you go on a holiday to visit him few times a year. He is always ready for you, you rent an apartment together and spend a few romantic weeks in it. You are not disturbed by things like, being up till morning and than he sleeps half of the day, he spents hours on his mobile with friends, or his friend calls and it is always a matter of life and death and he must immediately go away for x hours ...

And you don't even know those friends or his family.

You are extremely understanding, because you are so in love and don’t want to make any issues while on holiday.

You may not even be disturbed by the fact that you actually pay rent of the apartment, and you pay for most purchases and outings. Holiday ends, your heart stays in Egypt and you must return to reality. Unaware what he does after you leave. And this is how it can stay for months, years ...


But maybe not... maybe he will ask you to get married immediately, because you are the true love of his life. Oh, how romantic. You will arrange the papers for the wedding and you become officially married, what is next? If your husband has a job that will feed you, congratulations. Because finding a job will not be so easy for you. If he doesn’t, the first problems begin. How to pay the rent? Monthly expenses, not only for him but also for you?

You get pregnant in this situation? You don't see another solution just go back to your country.


The second option is that, he will not want to get married and will always find a great reason why. One of the reasons may be that his family would never accept a foreign woman, so he has no plans to legalize his relationship with you.

Or it is just fine like this for him, this way and he keeps relationships with several women.


The term so-called “Temporary wife” from Europe has spread in Egypt a lot nowadays. What’s the point of this kind of a wife? She will provide financial income for him and his Egyptian family, improve his financial situation, help him to obtain a visa or a green card. Some Egyptians can have several wives like this, even more than 4, as he can close as many Orfi marriages as he wants.


Many Egyptian men are very good manipulators. Asking European women to buy a property, telling her that she can’t be owner of the property and he put his name on all documents. Of course, 99% of women will not see money or property after they breakup. We live in the 21st Century, there are translators, lawyers, you can verify everything. Don't trust a person in a foreign country and don't sign something you don't understand.


If you decide for an official wedding, take note that you are also marrying his family. It is Egyptian national custom to interfere and give well-meaning advice. They like to be a part of every drama and they make it even bigger. It very much depends on your partner how he will deal with the situation and how he will let his mother interfere in your relationship. But to a large extent, the position of the mother / mother-in-law is inviolable. Therefore, armor with patience and a tip from me for free, come up with a tactic that will work on your mother-in-law. Be sure not to argue with her and try to have her support on your side. You have to reckon with the fact that part of your budget will also go to support his family. It is so common that children have to take care of mother and father or single sister.


Maybe your marriage is happy at first until you find out that your dear half actually has an Egyptian wife and children. It was probably because his mother pushed him so much that she managed to marry him with Egyptian wife. And he succumbed to the pressure for peace in the family. A mother-in-law can have such an impact if you live even abroad, that she can handle to play terminally ill and you will have to return to live back to his home country.


The last thing I would like to point out is the mentality of some Arabs and their will to control and show their wife what she can and can't do. Many of them think, that a woman is their property, so they forbid her to wear any clothes that would reveal her shoulders or legs, for example. They control who she can associate with, who she smiles at ... this control interferes with the freedom of women and is the cause of great misunderstandings, which sometimes result in physical violence. Only negative cases are written here, but all these situations have happened. That is why it is very important that you know your partner really well and do not rush into the relationship blindly. Before the wedding, it is important to sit down and agree on the conditions of your marriage and get to know his family. I always remind all my clients of the importance of the ORFI itself and later of the official marriage contract. You can specify the conditions for your legal protection in both. It is important how the contract is formulated and must be written by a lawyer who understands the issue very well. THIS ARTICLE WAS WRITTEN FOR INFORMATIVE REASONS, AND IS NOT THROWING ALL ARAB MEN IN ONE BASKET. If you have any questions, you can contact me at my email: I wish you good luck!

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